Why Dodgy Deserves Socks

My feet are so very cold

I won’t waste your time today. I want the Chessable socks. After a lengthy and increasingly aggressive campaign, the so-called Chessable Socks Manager (she will remain nameless for now) contacted me with an ultimatum - write a short essay on why I DESERVE the socks. This is my story.

Why do I deserve the socks? My campaign has been long and tireless. No one has worked so hard, for no reward, in the history of chess (except maybe Anish but he probably has the socks).

Here is a blow-by-blow account of my efforts:

May 2021: Chessable decided to start sending so-called “welcome packages” to new employees. Did old, hardworking employees receive these packages too? Maybe, BUT I DIDN’T.

Sergi_Ajedrez ♟♞ @AjedrezSergi

Welcome package 😍😍😍. Are you still doubting to join this company? #ChessableLife

MrDodgy is meditating in the forest @ChessProblem

ummm hello @chessable???????

Sergi_Ajedrez ♟♞ @AjedrezSergi

Welcome package 😍😍😍. Are you still doubting to join this company? #ChessableLife https://t.co/z1cLmeadjY

July 2021: Chessable started giving socks away. To regular normies.

Chessable @chessable

FREE *checks notes*... socks? Submit your video, win free socks. Click here! videoask.com/fav4ce09f

Once again, I remained sockless. Or socksless. NO SOCKS.

MrDodgy is meditating in the forest @ChessProblem

absolute mockery, I STILL DON'T HAVE THE SOCKS #FideMustCondemn

Chessable @chessable

FREE *checks notes*... socks? Submit your video, win free socks. Click here! https://t.co/xBV8sPrLaE https://t.co/YAfb8Fwqzq

August 2021: In a now infamous Masterclass fiasco, Peter Svidler gives away DOZENS of socks.

Encomio @tatanzak

So long, and thanks for all the socks @polborta #ChessableMasters

March 2022: Chessable so-called CEO tries to pacify the masses clamouring for socks. Note, he claims that socks are for staff and yet apparently this doesn’t apply to all staff members.

Geert van der Velde @blackatlantic

@IndiscreetSacr1 @ChessExplained @irene_sukandar @chessable @ChessProblem Not yet. The first batches are just for staff and authors like Christof. We aim to have a fully functional shop with cool merch by the (late) summer.

May 2022: In a transparent attempt to buy my silence, Chessable sent me a Chessable t-shirt and a Chessable hoodie. YET NO SOCKS.

MrDodgy is meditating in the forest @ChessProblem

i just want to state that @chessable DID send me merch but since socks were NOT included, i will be posting no pics. send socks immediately to break the siege

July 2022: If I can’t get the socks I want, I’ll make the socks I deserve. These exclusive beauties were the talk of the town at the Chennai Olympiad. They remain one of a kind.

September 2022: GM Jonathon Rowson celebrated his return to over the board chess with a brand new pair of socks and no doubt they were hand delivered by Chessable.

Jonathan Rowson @Jonathan_Rowson

Today I’ll be venturing back into the ocean of 64 squares, armed with 45 years of life, a Grandmaster title I hope to prove to be worthy of, and a secret weapon from @chessable

The #JusticeAndSocks4Dodgy campaign begins.

MrDodgy is meditating in the forest @ChessProblem

okay @chessable wtf is this? I still don't have socks?? #JusticeAndSocks4Dodgy

Jonathan Rowson @Jonathan_Rowson

Today I’ll be venturing back into the ocean of 64 squares, armed with 45 years of life, a Grandmaster title I hope to prove to be worthy of, and a secret weapon from @chessable https://t.co/BYibc4Xnk0

Followed by threats.

MrDodgy is meditating in the forest @ChessProblem

@blackatlantic @chessable send the socks. this is a threat

Apparently, threats were the way to go. Chessable is running scared and willing to cede to my demands to end the campaign. I will have my socks.

The moral of the story is never give up on your dreams and never stop complaining and resort to threats if you need to. This is the way.